Wear what it is that you want, whenever you want to wear it. The only thing that matters is if it makes you feel great, confident, and the most powerful version of yourself.
In light of International Women's Day, I've decided to share about my previous struggle with finding the confidence to wear clothes and outfits that I love, and how I've gotten to the point in my life where I can do so, without caring about potential judgement.
Today, fashion is a big part of my life, and I would go as far to say it constitutes as one of my biggest passions. I love the process of picking out what I want to wear in the morning. Going through my closet and sifting through pieces of clothing to find which ones will make me feel most like myself on that given day, is a really special and crucial part of my day.
As silly as it may sound, clothes have power. Personally, I know that when I wear an outfit that I love, I feel like a confident and powerful woman, ready to face the day and whatever challenges it may bring along the way. There is no better feeling than walking out of my house in the morning wearing something that makes me feel uplifted, put together, and a better version of myself.
All this is a product of wearing clothes I genuinely love, that make me happy every single day, without worrying or caring about judgement from others.
But I will be honest with you, I haven't always been this way. I haven't always had this mentality.
When I was in high school, at about 14 to 16 years old, I had a fear of dressing the way I wanted to, in a way that made me feel good about myself because I was scared of garnering judgement from my classmates and older students. Too often do I remember choosing outfits in preparation for the next day, and the next morning before leaving to catch the bus, making last minute changes, too scared to wear what made me truly happy, because I was afraid of what people might have thought.
So for the better part of my high school experience I wore basic and very boring outfits that allowed me to blend in with the other students, but most importantly, made me feel safe from the judgement I so badly feared.
But none of them made me feel like myself or the person I wanted people to know I was. Instead they saw a false, stripped back, inauthentic version of who I was pretending to be. But as I got older, I began to discover who it is that I really was as a person, which gave me the untapped confidence to start dressing in a way that would let people see the person that I truly was.
I remember this one time in high school, I wore a bright yellow peter pan collared shirt underneath a white knit sweater with black skinny jeans and a pair of black chelsea boots. Even though it may sound stupid, I was petrified about wearing that outfit to school, but I went ahead and wore it anyway, despite that insecurity. And you know what? I had a great day that day, and I felt confident in my outfit, something I hadn't felt before.
So slowly but surely, I stopped making those last-minute morning changes. I started leaving my house in outfits that made me feel like myself, knowing it might have made me stand out or maybe have people look at me. The only difference, was that this time I didn't care.
I realized that shouldn't dress to please other people, I should dress to please myself. At the end of the day, your outfit has the greatest impact on the way that you feel.
The truth is, people are too busy worrying about their own lives and insecurities to pay even the slightest bit of attention to you and what it is that you're wearing. Sure, people will maybe stare at you, but in a couple of minutes they'll have forgotten all about you.That fear you have of people snickering and staring at you, and the terrifying thought that they might be making fun of you? Most of that is in your head.
Now, I'm not saying that I'm perfect and that I never get nervous about wearing certain pieces that may be a little out of my comfort zone. But, I do challenge myself not to be afraid of what people might think, and remind myself that the only reason I should hesitate about wearing something is because it either doesn't make me happy or doesn't make me feel like myself.
There are so many things to worry about in life and your outfit should not be one of them. So wear what it is that you want, whenever you want to wear it. The only thing that matters is if it makes you feel great, confident, and the most powerful version of yourself.