It may have been tough, but I made it thanks to some great clothes and even better friends.
For those of you who don't know, this year I started university, where I am studying journalism. When I started university, I don't think I fully understood how mentally gruelling and demanding it would be.
There's a certain factor about university that makes it different and much more difficult from any other educational institution. And now that I've finished with my first year in my program, I've been able to put my finger on exactly what that factor is. It's the fact that, for the first time, you're with others who want the exact same thing you do. Because of that, you feel the need to compete with your peers.
And when I saw how intelligent and what great writers my classmates were, I started to experience a lot of self doubt and question if I had made a mistake and if I was even good enough to be in the program in the first place. And no matter how much my teachers, who are established and well-respected journalists and editors in the Canadian journalism market, would reassure me that if I had been accepted into the program it was most certainly because I demonstrated an untapped potential, I could never truly believe it.
The constant comparison I would subject myself to was a really unhealthy habit, one that majorly impacted my self-confidence. But that has recently been restored thanks to of a couple of things.
The primary thing is the amazing friends I have made in the past six months. Without their encouragement and support, I don't think I would have regained an ounce of my self-confidence. No matter how many times I reiterated how miserable I was and how unqualified I felt, they rejected those sentiments without fail. Every single time I displayed the slightest bit of self confidence, they would be right there to validate the writer and person I am. And for that, I could not be more grateful.
We have the kind of friendship that feels like we have known one another since birth. Whenever we're together, you can probably hear us before you see us because we're constantly laughing and having a good time. There's something about our friendship that is special, like a puzzle you figure out with one try because you just know that the pieces fit perfectly together.
The other thing that kept the last shred of my self-confidence alive was my clothes. I know this may sound superficial, but no matter how dejected I would feel, there was a something about wearing an great outfit that gave me an inexplicable confidence boost gave me and the motivation to keep on working towards my ultimate goal of becoming a fashion journalist.
Even though it's been a tough year, I'm so thankful to my friends for making it a little brighter. As I am getting closer to approaching the real world, I'm learning how to navigate these moments of doubt and confusion, and that life is a lot better, easier, and less stressful when you adopt a positive mentality and surround yourself with good things and people.